As the curtains fell on 2021, we finally got a chance to reflect on the year that was. The year was tough; full of what many may describe as major character development. Needless to say, it was a good year with silver linings of its own. Somethings worked and some didn’t, and these are exactly what we need to assess, while making resolutions this New Year.

Coming up with totally new resolutions may be difficult for most people. Heck I don’t think many people still believe in making resolutions in the first place. Nevertheless,it is way easier to start with, identifying bad habits to leave behind; habits that have dampened our lives and served nothing but to bring us down. As we close the books on 2021, let’s make a point to leave the following toxic habits to start with.

Toxic Feminism

Unlike its counterpart-toxic masculinity which is loud and abundant, toxic feminism is hidden and elusive. Nevertheless, it’s real and it is about time we acknowledge and deal with it. Its impact is detrimental to everything that women are fighting for.
Rather than being a movement of empowerment, feminism has become toxic when, for some people, it is now a weapon used to vilify men and take out their frustrations with the world on all men and even fellow women as well with little to no justification.

Anamika Gautam regards true feminism as understanding one’s rights, becoming insightful of one’s responsibilities and practicing total equality. “When it starts harming people and fills women’s head with false facts and lies, it becomes toxic,” says Gautam.

Surprisingly this has also manifested itself amongst the women themselves. The hate and indifference between women alike has become quite prevalent especially in our workplaces. As the men face issues head on, the women sit quietly plotting their fellow women’s’ downfall through sinister moves and psychological torment.

Enough is enough! Women are undoing it for themselves. Unfortunately, if this goes on, all the substantial gender issues will never be resolved if those they are aimed at helping cannot even help themselves.

Victim Mentality

I’m sure we have all heard this a million times before, but its true. Life is not fair! It never has been and it will never be. Sometimes, when things happen to us, we have this tendency to believe that it’s only happening to us. News flash! You’re not the first person to lose. Whether its a job, school test or a partner name it. Chances are that you’re going even to lose a lot more in future. It’s part of the process. It’s part of life.

In such situations we just need to take a minute and be still; keeping in mind that it will all come to pass. Let’s take responsibility for our lives and avoid passing on the blame to others or situations. Nobody can save us but us!

Overworking

With the rise of the ‘hustle and grind ‘culture, trends like overworking have been normalized and at some point even being used as the only determining factor to success at work. As a result people are working longer hours, sleeping late, eating less and drinking more just to cope. What makes the situation sadder is that, even despite all this effort, there exist managers who still claim that enough is not being done. The same people would replace you in a heartbeat if you dropped dead from all that unnecessary toil. Yet the other people around you-those who actually give a damn about you will be left to pick up the pieces.

Too many people are wearing burnout as a badge of honor and it needs to change before its loo late. In fact in 2022, let’s stop talking about how we can avoid burn outs and instead start talking about how to build a system that does not require it for success in the first place.

One -Sided Relationships

People keep on complaining about how relationships are hard. No they are not! They are only tough when one person is working on it. This applies to all kinds of relationships. Whether it’s romantic, family or even friendships.

Chris Rock says ‘Two people can easily move a couch; one person can’t move it at all”. Reciprocity brings balance. The lack of thereof brings nothing but frustration and resentment and ultimately some of the nastiest break ups. If you’re the only one putting effort into the relationship, then that’s the only red flag you need, cut them off! The rest of us who are actually putting in the work need your attention.😊

Busy Culture

In many cases, we tend to believe the busier we are, the more impact we are bound to have but in reality, studies have shown that busy culture actually destroys productivity and instead pulls us away from both our families and deeper relationships with our friends.

Everything at work is apparently urgent and can’t wait. We are always on our phones looking for the next big thing. It’s as if our lives are on a runaway train that we can’t manage to jump out of. We are taking too much on and it’s taking a toll on our personal lives.

Don’t be the coworker who never takes lunch breaks. Don’t be the person who literally runs from one place to another balancing loads of paperwork .Take more time for ice cream, dinners, and conversations, strolling and even cuddling. Remember life is fragile and it could end at any given moment. Let your last be worth it.